Chapter 17 — The Autumn Fan

Mother was a proud woman. Having already agreed to let Wang Shuying into the household, she would not make things difficult for her over a trifle like the timing of her entry.

Once Dou Zhiwei's "illness" had improved somewhat, she invited the First Madam and the Third Madam over to discuss the matter of Wang Shuying's entry, and Dou Yan was packed off to the courtyard to play jump-rope with the little maids.

The four little maids were named Xuan Cao, Mo Li, Qiu Kui, and Hai Tang. Mother, admiring Tuoniang's honesty and steadiness, gave her the name Su Xin, which paired nicely with Yu Zan—who had once served at Mother's side and was now assigned to Dou Yan's rooms—and the two became the senior maids of Dou Yan's household.

Tuoniang was very fond of the name, but "Tuoniang" held a special meaning for Dou Yan, and Dou Yan still preferred to call her Tuoniang—so much so that the maids in Dou Yan's rooms would call her Su Xin one moment and Tuoniang the next, giving rise to no end of laughter. Fortunately Tuoniang did not mind; whoever called her by whichever name, she answered cheerfully every time.

Dou Yan was not really a two-year-old child, so naturally she had little interest in a game like jump-rope.

She thought of going to Grandfather's study to look for a few books about ghosts and spirits and strange happenings—there was nothing in this world that did not exist somewhere. She had abruptly returned to her childhood, as if reborn, and surely there were others like her. She was eager to find some scrap or trace of it in those miscellaneous annals and old tales.

Dou Yan had Tuoniang carry her to Grandfather's study.

Tuoniang promptly dropped the rope in her hands and carried her off toward the Hall of Crane's Longevity.

As they rounded the lotus pond, she saw Granny Yu standing beside the Taihu-stone rockery, talking with a middle-aged man in a robe of official-green Lu silk.

The two were furtive and secretive, their conduct highly suspect.

Dou Yan pondered a moment, then pointed toward the lotus pond and said to Tuoniang, "Let's go over there!"

Tuoniang suspected nothing and, crossing the zigzag stone bridge, arrived at the edge of the Taihu rockery.

Granny Yu and the man had vanished without a trace.

Dou Yan left the lotus pond concealing her doubts, and ran headlong into the First Madam and the Third Madam.

She got down from Tuoniang's arms and respectfully paid her respects to the First Madam and the Third Madam.

The First Madam scooped Dou Yan up in one arm. "Shouyuan grows more lovable by the day!"

"Who would say otherwise?" The Third Madam smiled and stroked Dou Zhiwei's head. "Exactly the same as the Seventh Madam when she was small."

As they spoke, the smiles on their faces gradually faded.

"Ah!" The First Madam sighed with regret. "Wang Shuying's origins are what they are. If this child she's carrying turns out to be a boy, then no matter how virtuous the Seventh Madam is, I'm afraid she'll have no choice but to step aside!"

So they both knew about Wang Shuying's pregnancy.

Dou Yan's brow twitched almost imperceptibly.

"Such is fate!" The Third Madam's expression too turned somewhat melancholy.

Perhaps feeling it inappropriate for two elders to sigh so before a child, the First Madam forced a smile. "Here we are shedding tears over a storyteller's tale, worrying ourselves sick over people long dead. The Seventh Madam has simply never had to face anything difficult; now that something has come up, she'll naturally learn to handle it as she goes. Look at her now—isn't she managing quite well?"

The Third Madam nodded, then kindly asked Tuoniang a few questions. Learning that Dou Zhiwei was on her way to see Grandfather, she instructed Tuoniang to be careful of the slippery ground and not to let the child fall, and then she and the First Madam passed out through the second gate.

Dou Yan suddenly lost all desire to go to the Hall of Crane's Longevity. She told Tuoniang, "Let's go back to the main house."

Tuoniang obeyed without a word, and the two soon returned to the main courtyard.

Dou Yan ran into the inner chamber.

Mother was sitting on the heated kang by the window, talking with Granny Yu: "...Auntie Cui is the Seventh Master's birth mother; a betrothal gift of two hundred taels of silver is hardly an insult to her. As for whether the Wang family will accept it, that is their affair; whether we send it or not is ours. Rich or poor, a man wants a wife to see in the New Year. She may be a concubine, but she is still a bride, and entering the household on the twenty-second of the twelfth month, just in time for the Little New Year—by the Spring Festival she will be able to visit the various households and get to know the relatives." So saying, Mother lifted her teacup and took a sip, then continued, "As for the bridal chamber, let it be set up in Qixia Court..."

"Seventh Madam!" Granny Yu was startled and, before Mother could finish, blurted out, "How can that be! Qixia Court is right behind the Seventh Master's study..."

Mother made a gesture for her to stop. "They can carry on together across the whole of North Zhili—do you suppose putting them right under my nose will make them any purer?"

Granny Yu was struck dumb.

"Besides, I can't bear to watch that lovey-dovey display of theirs." Mother murmured, "I let Wang Shuying go, and I let myself go too."

Dou Yan almost wanted to applaud her mother.

Exactly so.

However vast the world, it is no vaster than oneself.

If you do not cherish yourself, what right has anyone else to cherish you?

Since she did not care for Wang Shuying, why demean herself by feigning virtue?

It had taken her past the age of thirty to understand this.

Dou Yan whispered to Tuoniang, "In a little while, follow Granny Yu and see where she goes and whom she meets."

Tuoniang nodded.

Dou Yan happily threw herself into her mother's arms. "Mother, the winter plums in the back garden have bloomed—let's go admire them."

Mother laughed softly and kissed Dou Zhiwei's little face. "Mother has things to do. Let Tuoniang take you out to play!"

Dou Yan only wanted to stay by her mother's side.

Mother did not mind the trouble; she went on attending to the household's petty affairs while teasing her in play.

Then Father suddenly came in and, heedless of the serving women filling the room, drew from his bosom like a man presenting a treasure a hairpin of pure gold set with green jade.

"Isn't it lovely?" He looked at Mother ingratiatingly. "I went all the way to Zhending Prefecture and had it made to order."

The shaft was a brilliant gold, the head a deep, glistening green, shaped like a teardrop—like a single tear at a beauty's cheek.

"Lovely!" Mother smiled and turned the jadeite hairpin over in her hands for a long while, then told Nurse Yu to put it away. "We'll save it for Shouyuan's dowry."

Father looked sheepish. "This one was for you... Shouyuan's, I'll buy her one later."

Mother pressed her lips together and smiled. "Whatever you provide for her later is your kindness; this is mine."

"What's mine is yours," Father muttered under his breath, then seemed to want to say more but held back.

Mother said with a smile, "You've come to ask about Wang Shuying entering the household, haven't you? I've already given the orders..." And she repeated to Father what she had told Nurse Yu.

Father said "Oh," in a tone that suggested little interest, yet also as though he had a great deal to say and did not know how to begin.

For a time there was silence.

After a while Father rose uneasily and murmured, "Since you have things to attend to, I'll be going."

Mother stood with a smile. "Then I won't see you out." She called for Hanxiao: "See the Seventh Master out!" Then she sat down again, lowered her head, and worked at her abacus.

Father stood there a moment; seeing that Mother never raised her head, a shadow dimmed his eyes, and he bowed his head and went out.